OBITUARY
 
 Died 24/7/365 in America's Heart, USA
 
 Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of
 Common Sense who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure
 how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic
 red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such value lessons
 as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the
 worm and that life isn't always fair.
 
 Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend
 more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids,
 are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well
 intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.
 
 Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for
 kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash
 after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only
 worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools! were required
 to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; however they
 could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted
 to have an abortion.
 
 Finally, Common sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments
 became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received
 better treatment than their victims.
 
 Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to
 realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in her lap,
 and was awarded a huge settlement.
 
 Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust,
 his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.
 
 He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner.
 
 Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone..